Don’t Get Mad, Get Glad!

By: Carletta Traylor aka C.N.

By a show of hands, who’s ready to forgive unfunny clowns for their absolutely MORONIC decisions?! Come on! You know that you want to! It’s good for you! You’ll feel much better if you do!

 

For those of you looking at me (you’re not really looking at me, per se, but looking at the computer or phone screen. Haha) like I’m speaking Spanglish (that’s some warped English-Spanish combo language that doesn’t make sense to ANYONE. Haha jkjkjk), let’s discuss what forgiveness is.

 

The word forgive means to stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw, or mistake. When someone says or does something ridiculously stupid (such as crashing your new Mustang into a tree (totaling it), throwing a baseball through your front window (*the sound of breaking glass* No, it’s not Stone Cold Steve Austin. Haha), breaking your $1,500 T.V. set that you spent your entire holiday check on (the accused isn’t the only one making questionable decisions. Haha), or talking out of his or her behind (their words are BUTT ugly)), which makes us really angry (and ready to shoot them out of a cannon, into a field in Switzerland somewhere…it’s COLD!!!!), we have two choices.

 

We can either hold on to that anger and bitterness, forever being miserable and wanting to punch those imbeciles in the face (I’m not advocating violence! I’m just being real here! Peace and grace! Jesus loves you. Haha), or we can decide to forgive that person, stop being angry, put what happened behind us (and try to mend our relationship with the person/people who hurt us), and move on.

 

We are all sinners in God’s eyes (we all say, do, don’t do, and think things that we shouldn’t and that God doesn’t like-whether intentionally (on purpose) or unintentionally (on accident)), and he has every right to be angry with all of us. However, instead of punishing us for our sins, and making us suffer forevermore (dying and going to Hell, to be in pain and torment forever), he showed us how much he loved us.

 

As John 3:16 (KJV) tells us, God loved us so much that he sent his only begotten son (our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ) to die on the Cross for our sins, that if we would trust and believe in Jesus, we would not perish (go to Hell when we die), but would have everlasting life (turn up with God the Father (God Almighty), God the Son (Jesus Christ), and God the Holy Spirit (the Holy Spirit) in Heaven forever! Ayeee!!!!!).

 

When we repent of our sins (ask God to forgive us of our sins, clean us up, and help us to stop sinning), believe in Jesus Christ (he died on the Cross for our sins, rose from the dead 3 days later, is in Heaven at God the Father’s right hand, and is coming back to take his children (believers in Jesus) home to Heaven and to judge/destroy this world), and trust in/believe in/follow Jesus the rest of our lives, God forgives us of our sins, and we are saved. When God forgives us of our sins, he wipes the slate clean (it’s like we never did our dirt, y’all! No sin, no hurt, no foul! Alright now! Haha). Just as God forgives us of our sins, he also wants us to forgive one another when we wrong/hurt each other (even when it seems IMPOSSIBLE to do). This shows that we love God, have been changed by the blood of Jesus Christ, and are truly his children.

 

In yesterday’s post, “Player Hating Ain’t Cute,” we explored the Bible story of Joseph’s brothers hating his guts and selling him into slavery (I just want to backhand all 12 of Joseph’s brothers (especially Reuben (the oldest brother; that loser) and Judah (the dipstick who convinced his brothers to sell Joseph into slavery)). Today, we will continue with Part 2 of this story (spoiler alert! It has more twists and turns than the Raging Bull and Déjà Vu at Six Flags! Haha), which further teaches us about forgiveness. Before we get into the forgiveness itself, I’m going to very briefly summarize what happened after Joseph was sold into slavery (the end of Genesis 37), leading up to the grand forgiveness story (Genesis 45 & 50). Don’t worry! I won’t ramble on and on (let’s get to the point, Junior! Haha); I’m a woman who likes to get to the point. Haha.

 

Once Joseph’s idiot brothers sold him into slavery-he was sold to Potiphar (one of Pharaoh’s ministers)-, God showed his favor toward Joseph. Potiphar liked the fact that Joseph was a lad of the Lord (he thought that little peach fuzz made him a man (I’m a man, Daddy!). You’re not grown, Sunshine! You need a mustache, a beard, chest hair, and a job for that! Haha jkjkjk I’m terrible. Haha), and as such, he promoted Joseph to overseer of his estate (a fancy way of saying that Joseph became the head of Potiphar’s estate).

 

Potiphar’s wife, however, was a trifling dipstick. Though she was married to Potiphar, she was attracted to Joseph (he was good looking, y’all! Haha), and wished to be intimate with him (cheater, cheater, pumpkin-eater! Speaking of pumpkins, I want some pumpkin pie right now. Haha). Joseph was a man of God, however, and he continuously refused her advances (thata’ boy, Joseph!). Potiphar’s wife wasn’t used to hearing the word “no,” however, so instead of taking her rejection like a woman and…oh, I don’t know,…BEING FAITHFUL TO HER HUSBAND…, she lied to Potiphar and told him that Joseph had been coming onto her/trying to have intimate relations with her (is this brain-dead bat serious?! You’re the one who wanted to be intimate with Joseph! He told you NOOOOOO!!!!!). Potiphar believed his wife, and as such, Joseph was thrown into prison.

 

While Joseph was in prison (where he was well liked by the warden and appointed the warden’s right-hand man), he interpreted the dreams of King Pharaoh’s cupbearer and baker (both of whom were also in prison), correctly predicting that the cupbearer would be released from prison (Mama, I’m free!), and the baker would be hanged (poo).  Pharaoh’s cupbearer promised Joseph that once he was released, he would talk to Pharaoh about getting Joseph released from prison as well.

 

Guess what, guys?! That lying scumbag forgot all about Joseph once he was released-he didn’t say a word to Pharaoh about Joseph-, and as such, Joseph remained in prison. Two years later, Pharaoh (that loud-mouthed doofus) had two very troubling dreams, which none of his advisors could interpret (lame!). Pharaoh remembered Joseph, however, and the cupbearer suggested that Joseph be summoned (better late than never, you jamoke!). Joseph (now 30 years old) came before Pharaoh, and he correctly interpreted Pharaoh’s dream: Egypt would experience 7 years of success (all of the rice and beans you can eat!), followed by 7 years of famine (a shortage of rain and food), and Pharaoh needed to store grain for the first 7 years to help hold him and his people over (I need my bread, man! Haha).

 

Pharaoh was extremely impressed by Joseph’s knowledge, and as such, Pharaoh appointed Joseph to viceroy of Egypt, making him second in command in Egypt, only under Pharaoh himself (our man has God-given power, y’all! He’s the second most powerful man in Egypt! Aye! Turn up! Haha).

 

This brings Joseph’s dream (where his family, the sun, the moon and the stars would bow down to and worship him; part of the reason why his brothers hated him and sold him into slavery in the first place) full-circle: as the second most powerful man in Egypt, everyone, including his family, the sun, the moon, and the stars, would now bow down to and worship him (God is good and always has a plan! He can always bring good out of a terrible situation!).

 

Now that Joey is an Egyptian ruler (our man! He’s not a boy anymore. Haha), we will next visit the forgiveness story (finally, Carletta! We were wondering how long we’d have to sit here and listen to you babble. Haha)-Joseph forgives his brothers for selling him into slavery.

 

From Genesis 42 to Genesis 50, the 7 years of success have passed in Egypt, and Egypt is now in the middle of the 7 year famine (as Joseph had predicted). The effects of Egypt’s famine were enormous, so much so, that nearby Canaan-where Joseph’s father and brothers lived-was suffering the effects of the food shortage. As such, Joseph’s brothers traveled from Canaan to Egypt to buy food from the viceroy…not realizing that the viceroy was their own brother, Joseph, whom they had sold into slavery 23 years earlier (and who they thought was dead). Once Joseph’s brothers arrived in Egypt (Joe recognized them, but they didn’t recognize him), he began to test them to see if they truly regretted selling him into slavery (let’s have some fun!).

 

• Joseph calls his brothers “spies” (which they deny being) and tells them to bring their youngest brother, Benjamin, to him. Simeon, the 2nd oldest brother, was kept in prison for 3 days until the others returned with Benjamin. Before they left, Joseph loaded their donkeys with grain, and returned the silver they brought to buy the grain. Joseph hid their money in their packs with the grain. When they found the money in their sacks, the brothers were afraid that this was somehow going to get them into trouble (we’re SOOOO busted!!!!). Their father, Jacob, refused to let Benjamin go to Egypt, even though Simeon was left in prison (way to pray to God and love your 2nd oldest, Jacob! Moron!) (Genesis 42).

• To calm Jacob’s fear, Judah promised to keep Benjamin safe…no matter what. Jacob agreed to let Benjamin go with his brothers. Jacob told his sons to take gifts to the man in Egypt (unbeknownst to Jacob, he was sending gifts to his beloved Joseph!). The brothers took lotions, spices, honey, almonds and pistachio nuts with them to Egypt (these were worth BIG MONEY during this famine, y’all!). Joe’s bros took money to buy more food, and they also took the money that had been returned to them when they tried to buy grain the first time. Get on to Egypt, Lassie! Haha (Genesis 42-43).

• When Joseph saw Benjamin and his other brothers coming down the path (looking as goofy as Flava Flav looks on a daily basis. Take that stupid alarm clock necklace off!!!! Haha jkjkjk…sort of. Haha), Joseph had his main servant take them to his house and prepare a big meal for them (YAASSSSS! Hot wings time! Haha). Joe’s bros were nervous about being in his house (they were SCUUURREEED, y’all! I sense warmer undies! Haha), thinking that they were in trouble for “stealing back” their money from their first trip to Egypt. They tried to explain themselves and return the money, but Joe allowed them to keep it. Simeon was released from prison, they had a big feast, and Benjamin was given 5x as much food as everyone else (the youngest child was being favored, as Joe himself was, to test his brothers’ reactions) (Genesis 43).

• The next day, as Joe’s 12 brothers left to return to Canaan, Joe told his main servant to fill their sacks with as much food as they could carry. He ordered that all of their money be placed inside their sacks as well. Joseph then gave an unusual order, telling his servant to put his special silver cup inside Benjamin’s sack (aww, snap!!!!!! Joe is about to play with them, y’all! Haha) (Genesis 44).

• Joseph ordered his servant to go after his brothers, accusing them of stealing Joe’s special drinking cup (in the words of Ricky Ricardo from I Love Lucy, Benjy, you’ve got some ‘plaining to do!!!!! Haha). The servant (acting like he didn’t know that HE put Joe’s cup in Benjamin’s bag! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) checked all of their bags, one by one, until he “discovered” the silver cup in Benjamin’s bag. All 12 of them quickly went back to Joseph’s house (still not recognizing Joseph), and when they arrived, they fell before Joseph, asked for his forgiveness (they BEGGED for his mercy, y’all!), and instead of throwing their little bro, Benjamin, to the dogs (like they had done with Joseph), they ALL offered to become Joseph’s slaves (Genesis 44).

• Joseph said that he only wanted to imprison Benjamin, at which point Judah (this popcorn fart again!) pleaded with Joseph. Judah told Joseph that his father favored his two youngest sons. One was Benjamin, and the other (Joseph) was no more (or so he thought). Judah explained that Jacob could not bear to lose his other beloved son. Judah then said the following:

Genesis 44:32-33 (KJV)-For thy servant became surety for the lad unto my father, saying, If I bring him not unto thee, then I shall bear the blame to my father forever. Now therefore, I pray thee, let thy servant abide instead of the lad a bondman to my lord; and let the lad go up with his brethren.

 

NOTE: Would you looky-here?! Judah, the same ignoramus who convinced his brothers to sell Joseph, the favored child of Jacob, into slavery, has now repented of his sins, and is willing to defend and lay his life down for his younger brother, Benjamin, also the favored child of Jacob. God can change anyone, y’all! Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Thank you, Jesus! God is good!

 

Joseph sees the change in his brothers, and he decides to reveal himself to them and forgive them. Upon seeing how different they were, especially Judah, Joseph broke down and cried, and told everyone to leave him and his brothers alone for a moment (everyone scram…except for you 12 bozos. Haha). In Genesis 45:3-9 (KJV), the big reveal happens:

 

Genesis 45:3-9 (KJV)-And Joseph said unto his brethren, I am Joseph; doth my father yet live? And his brethren could not answer him; for they were troubled at his presence. And Joseph said unto his brethren, Come near to me, I pray you. And they came near. And he said, I am Joseph your brother, whom ye sold into Egypt. Now therefore be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither: for God did send me before you to preserve life. For these two years hath the famine been in the land: and yet there are five years, in the which there shall neither be earing nor harvest. And God sent me before you to preserve you a posterity in the earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So now it was not you that sent me hither, but God: and he hath made me a father to Pharaoh, and lord of all his house, and a ruler throughout all the land of Egypt. Haste ye, and go up to my father, and say unto him, Thus saith thy son Joseph, God hath made me lord of all Egypt: come down unto me, tarry not.

 

BOYYYYYYY! When I tell y’all that Joe’s bros were scared “you know what” –less when they found out that the viceroy of Egypt was their own brother, Joseph, they had Niagara Falls going down the sides of their legs! Haha. They expected Joseph to be upset with (and bitter toward) them for how they had treated him 23 years earlier (hating him and selling him into slavery), but Joseph had been touched by God.

 

Instead of being bitter and having his brothers killed (he had the power to do so as the viceroy of Egypt!), Joseph told his brothers not to blame themselves for what had happened-it was God’s will for Joseph to go to Egypt to become a ruler and help the people through the famine. Joseph further promised to feed, clothe, and take care of his father, his siblings, and their families, as there were 5 more years of famine to come. Joseph told his broskis to go get the rest of the family, bring them to Goshen (they would live near Joseph), and not waste time. At that moment, Joseph fell upon Benjamin’s neck, wept (cried), and kissed him. Joseph then fell upon each of his brothers’ necks, weeping, and he kissed all of them as well (this is flipping beautiful, man! Haha).

 

Joseph had forgiven his brothers for the wrong they had done to him, and he took care of them the rest of his life (Jacob was overjoyed to discover that Joseph was still alive! Holy Ghost party time! Turn up! Ain’t no party like a Holy Ghost party, ‘cause a Holy Ghost party don’t stop! Party over here! Ooh-ooh! Party over here! Ooh-ooh! Haha).

 

In Genesis 50, following Jacob’s death (which greatly affected Joseph and his brothers), Joseph once again forgave his brothers for hating him and selling him into slavery, once again assuring them that God meant for him to be in Egypt to save his (God’s) people. Joseph hugged his brothers, kissed his brothers, wept with his brothers, and their relationship had been mended (Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Thank you, Jesus! God is good!). Joseph lived to be 110 years old (a spring chicken!), and upon his passing, he was embalmed (his body was preserved with spices to keep it from decaying. Get on, gnats! Haha) and buried in Egypt.

 

WOW! What a great story! God used Joseph to teach us all a lesson about forgiveness. Though Joseph’s brothers hated him (due to Jacob favoring him over them, as well as Joseph’s dream about them eventually bowing down to and worshipping him) and sold him into slavery, he forgave his brothers, reconciled their relationship (by embracing them, loving them, and taking care of them and their families until his dying day), and used his position to make sure that they didn’t want or lack for anything. That’s a true showing of God’s (Jesus Christ’s) love!

 

If any of you all find yourselves in a situation where you need to forgive someone for something (or you need to ask someone for his/her forgiveness), “just do it” like Nike and “let it go” like Frozen! Haha. Don’t hold on to the anger; don’t allow your bitterness to rob you of precious time that you’ll never get back. Just as God forgives us of our sins through his son, and our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, let us forgive one another for acting like we don’t have any home training. Haha.

 

Given the length of today’s story, I will not do a modern day remix of it. No worries, though! The remixes will be making a comeback next week! Until then, I hope that you all enjoyed today’s post! I pray that you all have wonderful weekends (eat lots of candy for me!)! I love you all, God bless you all, and I’ll see you all on the next one!

 

-Carletta