Pikaboo! Jesus Sees You!

By: C.N.

Who doesn’t love a good scavenger hunt? As kids, we were always excited to find the secret egg with the good candy in it (We don’t want any candy corn! Give me a Snickers! I get a little loopy when I’m hungry. Haha). As a sports fan, I always bought the trading cards to find the golden goose (Michael Jordan, Sammy Sosa, Brian Urlacher, classic Walter Payton, the works! Where have you been all of my life?!). We could be presented with 200 different cards or eggs, yet our minds and hearts were focused on finding that one jewel-the one that was unlike any other, the one that we had a close connection to, the one that we truly loved, the one that we couldn’t live without. This is exactly how Jesus Christ feels about us. It’s no secret that we’re all sinners (we all say, do, and think things that we shouldn’t), but Jesus Christ loved (and continues to loves) us so much that he died on the Cross to save us from our sins. Jesus is constantly looking for lost souls to bring to him; I like to think of coming to Jesus as ABC-Admitting that we’re sinners and asking God to forgive us of our sins (and helping us to not sin anymore); Believing that Jesus Christ is God’s son (God in bodily form), died on the Cross, rose on the 3rd day, is in Heaven with God Almighty (his father), and is coming back for his children; Committing our lives to Jesus (putting God first in our lives and following Jesus every step of the way). Jesus is always looking for people who don’t know him-the people are the sheep, and he is the shepherd (someone who takes care of the sheep). This brings us to the story of the Lost Sheep in the Bible.

When Jesus lived on earth (33 years), teaching the people about the Kingdom of God, he had many haters (are y’all mad?!). One particular group of people, the Pharisees (they didn’t believe that Jesus Christ was the Savior of the world or God in the flesh), always tried to make Jesus look bad (while they looked like death and made Shaggy from “Scooby-Doo!” look like the most handsome man in the world). The Pharisees wondered why Jesus always talked to and spent time with sinners (His homeboys! His road dogs! His “day ones!” His ride or die partners! His BFFs!). Jesus replied by saying the following:

Matthew 18:12-14 (KJV): How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

Jesus shut that conversation DOWN! He made clear to the Pharisees that it was his mission to save as many souls for the Kingdom of God as possible; God does not want anyone to be lost and to miss Heaven. Jesus Christ will kick it with the sinners (with the jams playing, sweet tea, BBQ and all, y’all!) to bring them to him; he will go to the pool party with ninety-nine healthy (saved) people to find that one sick (lost) person to cure. When a lost soul comes to Jesus Christ, Heaven starts partying like it’s 1999 (it’s time for the Electric Slide, y’all!)! When that one lost sheep comes to Jesus Christ, the angels in Heaven start singing, dancing (let’s do the New Jack City bounce!), playing instruments (rock out, dudes!), clapping, rejoicing, and praising God. Our baby has come home!  Our baby has come home! Come here and give Momma some sugar! Suki suki, now! Jesus will always search for lost souls (much better than we search for lost car keys, wallets, or glasses…on our faces-don’t judge me. Haha), and there isn’t anything that the naysayers can say or do about it (didn’t Mother ever teach you that bumping your gums gets you nowhere?!). Thank you, Jesus! Hallelujah! I wonder how this scenario would play out in modern times (my creative juices are flowing again, and Niagara Falls doesn’t have anything on this stream!)? I can’t help myself! Let’s get to it! NOTE: I will be utilizing modern-day language, technology, and ways of living in this story, as we’re picturing this happening today.

Pikaboo! Jesus Sees You!

By: C.N.

Biblical Reference: Matthew 18:12-14 (KJV); Luke 15:3-7 (KJV)

*Jesus is hanging out at the village block party with his homies…those filthy scoundrels!*

Pharisees (with their noses so far in the air, they can smell Saturn’s behind): Look at this nonsense right here. What is Jesus doing? He’s supposed to be this holier than thou “Son of God,” teaching, preaching, healing and helping others, yet he’s talking to those scums of the earth. That guy robbed a bank last week, that girl stole someone’s car and drove to Cancun (just to come back looking like the Kool-Aid Man’s sister; so…much…sunburn), and I’m pretty sure that kid just got kicked out of school for fighting (thug life meets “clean up my house and kill all of the bugs” life; East Side!). Why would Jesus hang out with them? They’re all going to end up in jail one day, which is only going to make him look worse. Let’s go talk to him.

*The Pharisees confront Jesus, really thinking that they’re doing something impressive…those misguided miscreants*

Pharisees: Jesus?! Jesus?! Can we ask you a question?

JESUS CHRIST: Sure. The floor is yours.

Pharisees: Why are you hanging out with them? They don’t obey the law. They don’t listen to authority. They do everything that you tell them not to do, they don’t care, and they think that they’re getting away with something. How are you telling people to turn away from their sins and turn to God, yet you’re breaking bread and drinking fruit juice with the enemy? Doesn’t that seem a little contradictory to you? Aren’t you worried about people thinking that you’re a hypocrite (someone who does the very things that he/she tells other people not to do)? That’s why so many people don’t want to go to church as it is-too many hypocrites (there’s always room for one more!).

*Jesus prepares to verbally destroy their entire existence with a very smooth response-so cool, calm, and collected. Flex.*

JESUS CHRIST: How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

Pharisees: We understand that you want to save souls, Jesus, but you can’t save everyone. Some people are just born to be scandalous. Do you see that woman with the blue flowery dress on? Let’s just say that she likes to drop it like it’s hot for a few Abe Lincolns. She told us that she loves that life, she’s going to continue to dance like that, and there’s nothing any of us can say or do about it. Trifling!

JESUS CHRIST: What man of you, having an hundred sheep, if he lose one of them, doth not leave the ninety and nine in the wilderness, and go after that which is lost, until he find it? And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbours, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost. I say unto you, that likewise joy shall be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, more than over ninety and nine just persons, which need no repentance.

Pharisees: We understand that, Jesus. But what about this loser in red? He just got out of jail for killing three people in cold blood! He’s a monster! How can you know what he has done and just sit there, eating spaghetti and greens with him (mmm…and some cornbread)?

JESUS CHRIST: How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

Pharisees (about to lose their minds…oh, wait): This is ridiculous! We’re not getting anywhere with him. He keeps saying the same thing over and over again; it’s like talking to a wall or a spoiled brat-everything goes in one ear and out the other (erm, Pharisees? Walls don’t have ears. You all clearly aren’t the sharpest knives in the drawer)! We might as well give up trying to reason with Jesus; he’s determined to be with these worthless ingrates (Pharisees, you might want to stop spewing that hot garbage from your diarrhea holes before Jesus gives you a divine double forearm to the throat or a Holy headbutt (POW! I knock the evil out of you in the name of the Father! Just kidding…Jesus is love. Haha)). Let’s get out of here, guys. These disgusting worms (people) are making me itch (and you all make our skin crawl as well, Pharisees).

JESUS CHRIST: How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish.

Jesus loves us all and will always be on a mission to save lost souls for the Kingdom of God (there’s no “Mission Impossible” over here!). Jesus Christ is the shepherd, and we are the sheep. If we admit that we’re sinners and ask God to forgive us of our sins (and help us to stop saying, doing and thinking bad things), believe that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior, and commit the rest of our lives to following him (putting him first), we shall be saved. While the ninety-nine are healthy and doing well (or so they think), Jesus is looking to bring that one lost sheep back to him (come here, baby!). Thank God that Jesus loves a little sinner like me (and forgave me for throwing sour cream at my teacher back in the day. Grace). Let us live, let us love, and let us spread the gospel of Jesus Christ everywhere that we go (we’re not worried about no stinking haters! God’s got this!). May God bless and keep you all, and as always, I love you all!

-C.N.